I’m currently en route to Surrey for the Easter weekend to spend some quality time with family. A time to relax and laugh. I take in some deep breaths as my shoulders drop and my mind wanders wistfully into the surrounding countryside …

Now my children are a little older and less dependant, long journeys can be a opportunity to process a mental back log of thoughts, emotions and all the associated information that comes with them.

This week has been a most challenging week, challenges which will not conclude because it’s Friday or the Easter Weekend.

My most dearest friend’s husband  is currently hospitalised in critical care and facing an uncertain future. The pain, sadness, fear and vulnerability this has created has been immensely profound for all involved.

What I have noticed in abundance this past week is the resolve of the human spirit to cope. It is astonishing that so many times when we think we can’t, we can. I have seen, felt and experienced people come together with an unrecognisable force. A determination that roars as a primal pack. It holds the space to create strength so that wherever there is weakness it will bring strength; wherever there is fear it will bring hope and wherever there is a faltering it will stand tall.

My heart expands with the love, support and honour ability of those who have stepped up and given all they have, to be all they can be for those who need it the most. That honourability has created a web of safety and protection which is maleable to any given moment.

There been a first hand restoration of faith for the human spirit this week where almost stratospheric chaos has created compassionate order, something I feel proud to witness.

Life doesn’t stop when there is personal upheaval. That twilight zone of disproportionate reality sets in, deluding you over what’s real or the gravity of what’s not. We become confused with our perspectives and decisions; our emotions charge ahead leaving our logic behind. We exist in a suspended state of limbo unsure of how life will unfold over the following days. All our fragile certainties evaporate leaving a trail of residue reflecting the recent past.

This story is by no means over and I hope that I may write over the coming days of the heroic battle won by my dear friend. I pray that in time we may chuckle at some of those moments which have almost taken breaths away … But for now I take my respite from this unfathomable pain and sadness and leave my heart in the hands of those left behind. I thank them for encouraging me to take leave and take time with my own family to breathe … a luxury I can still take.

To everyone who is fighting their battle at this time or those warriors who are holding the space for others,  I pray for your strength, courage and fortitude to be all that you need to be …

With love, light and blessings to you all. May you have the most peaceful of weekends …

Steph xxxx